Ein weiteres Wochenende in der Hölle

May 14th... and yes I'm here in the middle of nowhere, in the middle of the jungle, in the middle of nothing... away from everything, and everybody I might care...if only it wasn't so fucking expensive to leave this town on weekends at least I'd be at home... but recently not even my mom's house feels like home, it's a direct consequence of living for so long here, I had to stay here for so long so I can save some money and I can actually afford some things I do like and I feel good wearing and owning, but I wonder if it's so high price to pay... it's been a year, more than a year since I got here.

I was in Bogotá with my lover at that time... I called mom and she told me the "Hearing" to pick some jobs was gonna take place within the next days... of course there was a big issue, I was scheduled to be in Buenos Aires, I was totally fucked up, that was gonna be the first time I was gonna be in another country and picking up a fucking job in the middle of nowhere wasn't going to fuck up that wonderful chance...so I did what I had to do, I empowered my mom to pick my job...well it was like picking a job but picking the place where I was going to be send to work...yes everything was fucked up, so many things may go so wrong, specially because I feared my mom was going to be tricked for somebody in the Hearing room in Sincelejo.

Thank God, my mom did so great in the hearing or at least that was what I heard, and I end up here in the middle of nowhere...but hey it could be so fucking worst, actually I think Mommy gave the chance to write right here right now, or maybe I was end up in an actual jungle, like some of my college classmates that ended up in places with no electricity, sweet water, cell phones, and worst with no Internet... that's an actual hell, and thanks to mom, I'm not there.

I went to Argentina where, surprise!, I was the fool again, I lost my wallet, I was got into some nightclub where they took money from me, I thought I was screwed but that's what happen when you go after unknown people in unknown countries, yes for the record it was in Florida Street in downtown Buenos Aires... got fucking scared, thank God I didn't have my passport on me or anything worthful like cameras or cellphones, actually my clothes were so stupid...and that wasn't the end, but thank God Colombians like me learn real fast when someone attempts to get your stuff without your permission. I was walking with my companion and suddenly some stinky crap was thrown onto ours jackets, and like magic some old, ugly witch came out from nowhere and she attempted to help us, with some water she had on, very useful, you know... of course I quickly understood she wanted to get our jackets and God knows what else, I suspect that it may had something on that water... but thank God I got it real fast and get me and my companion away from the stinky witch... and later I lost my wallet, maybe in a cap, maybe in the stadium... and also my companion lost his camera....fuck, so cool pics and they were lost for good.

But the pluses topped the minuses, I specially remember the walking I made from the hotel to the cool Boca Juniors Stadium, in the Boca neighborhood, but weel that's more topic for my Wordpress blog than for this blog, and yes I'm here and today's saturday (and Sunday comes afterwards) and I got a mountain of work to do, so I have to take advantage of all my time today... so I can finish my work tomorrow and wait for this days to end real, real fast, after all I don't belong here.

Quaräntane

Yes, now that I finally I don't have internet on my cellphone, I've decided to wait one full month to adquire my new one... but I haven't decided yet if I'm gonna get a new BB, or an Android phone, I think the BB is a best idea since the companies are offering better and cheaper plans for BlackBerry than for Android which is kinda unknown here in Colombia, so I'm gonna take it easy... it's gonna be a quarantine, 40 days of reflexion, my own easter lol, I saw it coming anyway. This BB is not mine, it was a gift, but I never felt it mine...

Well I'm back in the jungle again... the way back here was as usual very interesting, and also scary, I woke up yesterday 4:30 in the morning, and at 5:45 I was ready...but since everybody got their own agenda...we actually left by 8:30, then after two hours we got to the place where the water destroyed the road, so we had to get on a boat, and after 45 minutes of an awful trip... we got land again... and also a workmate who was in the car with us, got sick.

And now first day in the jungle with no cellphone, at least I'm free, I've got nobody bothering me, I'm free again...let's see for how long, this is the first day of the quarantine, 39 and a half to go...

Save something from yourself

Traveling to Montería having so few hours before coming back to this point lost in the map, was a risky decision. Having in mind all what could go wrong, it is like a miracle that everything came up so great, that as far it's my best trip of the year and I was in Medellin this year.

I arrived late, like 5 pm and I had someone waiting for me, that´s why the first thing I did was getting something for them. The Iced-tea that leaded us to meet, and the usual chocolate...then the phone rang, it was them...they were across the street with somebody else, I was feeling uncomfortable, but I remembered I had talked to their companion, and it was a really cool person, lovely, caring... anyway but for some reason I was feeling not that easy.

I crossed the street and yes, i was afraid, they had told me I looked so different in my facebook pics that it was hard to tell how I'd look face to face...and well... I crossed the street, and I could see them both, it was weird. Then we decided to hang out for a while and things got easier, but I´m not that cool when meeting people for the first time, but I didn´t wanna look like that, so I tried to talk, and having the girl by my side was real helpful.

Then, real cool things happening, but the top moment of the night was when I was told -in british accent by the way- "you´re a giver, but you should´t be, SAVE SOMETHING FOR YOURSELF" and that was the best advice I´ve got in years I think, maybe I want to please other people instead of me, but maybe that´s the problem, once I´ve given everything, I´m not interesting anymore.

I had to say that discussing with my best friend the same day wasn´t helping that much, I was distracted, and I didn´t want to look distracted...but thank God, I called him and we´re friends again. Waking up was hard, i knew I had to go back to Sincelejo, but I didn´t know it was gonna be that way. I didn´t wanna go, I wanna spend more hours, lying there, feeling the way I was feeling, but duty calls, and I have a responsability even when it´s not the kind of responsability I'd like to have... and then sleeping the whole way to Sincelejo, and being the messenger for people in this town didn´t leave anytime to rest, and then the whole way to this place, again, in the middle of nowhere, far way from the things and people I care about. It´s very hard. I got dreams.