Der perfekte Sex

Have you ever felt that you have done something totally cool, extraordinary, but at the end you feel an empty void in your heart? Probably not, lol, but yes, the holy week's just begun and it's made me realize that maybe we're not made, or at least I'm not made to be happy...I just can't find the perfect mix of things I want...

Perfect sex? yes, it's possible, been there, you can find the right person, the right time, to do exactly want you wanna do in sex, everything you could possibly want, even the post-sex minutes... but once you leave the room, it's all gone... no friendship, no contact, nothing, or well, at least the memory... no strings attached...

And love on the other hand... but something lacks, love or sex? love or attraction? what's the right rate? But at the end of the day, something keeps missing, maybe it's just me, maybe I'm just wrong...

PD: I got new shoes! :)

One Quarter

It really is the quarter of the year, and it is not easy to imagine that as much as we want the time to go by as fast as it can, because we wanna rest the weekend or maybe we want our vacations the sooner it's possible, or just because we're waiting a special date in the calender, but what we don't realize very well, or at least we seem to forget is that every single day is a unique chance, a wonderful gift, coz one day down it's one less to go, until (yes) the day we're leaving this world for good.

No matter if we believe in a heaven, in hell, reincarnation, or anything else about what happens to us after life, but the truth we know is we're here, sharing our life, and I'm kinda confused when I think what the fuck I should do with my life.

My culture (Colombian Caribbean) has taught me that life is worth living ONLY if we enjoy, the more we enjoy the better life is, but I've heard somewhere else, that wasting our bodies and life drinking, eating, and (yes) fucking, it's not the right way to go.

So here I am, confused, I think a life is worth living if you do what you like, I love enjoying my moments alone, love writting, love watching movies, love traveling, love taking pictures, and even when I'm doing those things everyday, there's nothing to stops me from doing it, even the responsabilities I got now.

So that's what I'm gonna do, keep enjoying my moments alone, keep writting, keep watching movies, keep travelling, keep taking pictures, and keep taking care of my duties, if only I could get paid from doing those things, but what the hell, not everybody got that chance, and it's not like I'm looking too much.

Well, by the way I wanna write about something very weird, there's somebody I thought was against me, for some reason, but lately I think this person is trying to get along with me, and I don't know what to expect, but, shit, it would be fucking awesome if I got the chance to...well...let's say it, to get laid, i got to do something but while ideas come to my mind, I got to look for a song to fit this post. lol

Wow!

(To somebody I like)

Wow, now it feels like OMG I'm a fucking teenager all over again, I hadn't felt this way in like what, 12 years? yes it's like I'm a teen again, when I was fourteen I fell for someone, I never felt that way before, I just couldn't stop seeing and yes it was useful for mental fuel, a lot of nights, once I got to touch, and it was amazing, all my heart beat and yes I wanted it, my hormons wanted me to do it, but I was completely sure nothing was gonna happen, it was absolutely impossible, just like now.

I'm on my way to my 30s with no way back, but feeling this it's like OMG this is what I want to feel, this presure, this urgency, this need, this is what I need to feel, this what makes me feel alive, the desire, just to watch is better than anything else, if only I could have this, and satisfy my hunger. but there's no way. It's too dangerous , but sometimes I feel it worths the risk, any risk, God it's like wanting to eat, drink and breathe someone, everything at the same time. And abstinence doesn't help. If only I could, if only I'd know. But everything is in the dark, I just want to know, just wanna have one more chance, a second, a minute, an hour, where and when it all will be sweat, but fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkk it's not posible.

At least I can dream, and in my thoughts you've done all that I want and more, you're not perfect or gorgeous, but God you're so sex, so fucking sex, the one who invented that word was thinking about you, damn it, God,  it's exciting just remember you, at least I know you're leaving anytime soon, and you have no fucking idea I'm lurking ya, and that everything in me is touched when I see you. Feeling like a teenager, but now I'm an adult, a man, and I know what's the next step and if only, if only you could gimmie a sign, just one I'll go for it. Trust me.

Meanwhile, you're gonna be with me, at night even when you don't realize you're actually there.