Wow!

(To somebody I like)

Wow, now it feels like OMG I'm a fucking teenager all over again, I hadn't felt this way in like what, 12 years? yes it's like I'm a teen again, when I was fourteen I fell for someone, I never felt that way before, I just couldn't stop seeing and yes it was useful for mental fuel, a lot of nights, once I got to touch, and it was amazing, all my heart beat and yes I wanted it, my hormons wanted me to do it, but I was completely sure nothing was gonna happen, it was absolutely impossible, just like now.

I'm on my way to my 30s with no way back, but feeling this it's like OMG this is what I want to feel, this presure, this urgency, this need, this is what I need to feel, this what makes me feel alive, the desire, just to watch is better than anything else, if only I could have this, and satisfy my hunger. but there's no way. It's too dangerous , but sometimes I feel it worths the risk, any risk, God it's like wanting to eat, drink and breathe someone, everything at the same time. And abstinence doesn't help. If only I could, if only I'd know. But everything is in the dark, I just want to know, just wanna have one more chance, a second, a minute, an hour, where and when it all will be sweat, but fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkk it's not posible.

At least I can dream, and in my thoughts you've done all that I want and more, you're not perfect or gorgeous, but God you're so sex, so fucking sex, the one who invented that word was thinking about you, damn it, God,  it's exciting just remember you, at least I know you're leaving anytime soon, and you have no fucking idea I'm lurking ya, and that everything in me is touched when I see you. Feeling like a teenager, but now I'm an adult, a man, and I know what's the next step and if only, if only you could gimmie a sign, just one I'll go for it. Trust me.

Meanwhile, you're gonna be with me, at night even when you don't realize you're actually there.